This post was originally posted over at my Vox blog; I thought I'd share with y'all.

MONDAY, 7/31

I woke up with a stomach ache. While brushing my teeth, I almost threw up in the sink. There was this nagging feeling in my stomach, and I guess it was exacerbated by my premonition today that I was going to get fired today. After getting back in my office from a public safety training, I had an e-mail that both her and the director needed to urgently see me. I had no idea what it could be for, but immediately, I knew it wasn't good. The day petered out and I left work hearing nothing from either of them.

But today, I could see myself in Micro-Manager's office trying to plead my case as to why I should stay (read: I need the money) and could vividly picture all the scenes, what she was wearing…the whole nine.

So I come in this morning, see a brief glimpse of her and sure enough…she's wearing the same thing as in my premonition. To be fair, it was also the same thing she had on Friday, so perhaps it was more memory than anything else. I go in my office and start working, and Goofball comes to my office.

"Can we go for a walk?"

The feeling came back. "Sure. I need to grab some tea."

So we walk over to Starbucks and he talks about his weekend. When we get back to his office, he sits down, types out something in Word, signs it, and puts it in Micro-Manager's desk.

Goofball's quitting.

My fate, on the other hand, is still up in the air. That is, until…

TUESDAY, 8/1

OK, here's the situation. Micro-Manager went away on a week's vacation. And Goofball just chucked the deuces with force! Does the staff mind? Mmm…well, of course not.

Plus ten points if you get that lyric smash.

Hortense and D.A.W.G. are reeling now because Goofball, who did half of the Illustrator and Photoshop work (I did the other half), tendered his resignation effective September 1. Everyone was shocked because Goofball is a good worker (albeit goofy at times, hence the name), very easy-tempered, and generally a joy to work with in any business environment. What could possibly have happened to cause him to quit? That's the elephant in the room no one's acknowledging, because we all know why.

Around 11:00 a.m., I was in my office finishing up a report when I got a phone call from the company I interviewed with a few weeks back. I was skeptical to hear from them because while I took their designer test, they ended up calling me on the 27th of July to tell me that she had twenty-five more people to interview. I figured she was calling to tell me thank me for interviewing and that they'd keep my resume on file for a year in case some other position comes open.

Well…that wasn't it. They called to formally offer me the position. More money. Cooler location. Higher position too…they wanted me as a web designer, not the junior web designer. That means I'd have two people under me. Management. Of course, I accepted it with the quickness.

And since no one else was in the office, I was able to get my tootsie roll on in excitement of getting a new job.

I went looking for Goofball, and told him the news.

"Thank fucking God!" he screamed. With the two of us leaving at such an inopportune time (we're about to launch into a very very busy season), the department would be all kinds of assed-out since none of those chicks know their way around Photoshop or Illustrator.

We came back to the office and Hortense, D.A.W.G. and Captain Obvious were in the break room, and Goofball and I walked in.

"I have an announcement to make…"

"Don't tell me you're leaving too!" said Captain Obvious.

"Yeah…I am. I just accepted a wonderful offer and my last day is on the 15th."

Curtly, both Hortense and D.A.W.G. reply "Oh, that's great. Good luck." Then, Goofball and I went to lunch, had homemade banana bread, pasta and some pineapple sponge cake. In the meantime, I'm sure the three of them went frantic alerting Micro-Manager and anyone who could listen. Basically, they think we planned it…but it's really just coincidence. Seriously! But dude…what an AWESOME coincidence.

God truly has a sense of humor.